Writers infuse their books with emotion to engage readers.
Some writers are marvelous at adding emotion to every sentence, but find it
tricky to write action. I am not one of those writers.
My specialty is action. The more, the better! While I do
include my character’s emotions, I don’t always add it in my first draft. Sometimes
I get so caught up in the events happening that I forget to include their
feelings. Fortunately, that’s where good beta readers and editors come to the
rescue. One of my beta readers, Lilly Gayle, helped pinpoint places lacking
emotion. She saved my story!
Here is one of the emotional scenes from Seismic Crimes
that Lilly actually didn’t have to tell me to embellish.
EXCERPT:
“Well, I’m glad to be talking to you now. Have you heard
from your brother?”
The breath fled from his lungs. “Mom, there’s something I
have to tell you.” He paused, bracing for the aftermath of his words and
decided getting it over with quickly would be the best option for both of them.
“Ryan was murdered working on a case.”
A moment of silence stretched on the other side of the
phone, much like the calm before a storm. Then his mom emitted a cry. Her grief
vibrated the phone in Donovan’s hand. He pulled it away, turned his head, and
closed his eyes. Her cry continued for several heart-wrenching seconds. When
there was a pause, he brought the phone back to his ear.
“Mom?” he said it softly, cautiously, as if approaching an
injured animal.
Another wail broke free, then another and another. Donovan
dropped his head, heavy with her sorrow. He tightly clutched the phone, the
earpiece pressed to his forehead as he listened to her sob from a shattered heart.
Tears quietly slipped from his eyes.
Other than his grandmother, he and Ryan were the only ones
left in his mom’s life. Now she was down one son.
He remained on the line while she cried. He might not be
there to comfort her, but he could stay on the phone until her tears stopped
flowing. It took a long time. He didn’t quite know how long. When grief was involved,
minutes could feel like an eternity. But when her crying quieted, and she was
able to catch her breath again, she said his name.
“I’m still here,” he told her and realized the truth of that
statement. Ryan was gone, but he was still there.
Title: Seismic Crimes
Author: Chrys Fey
Series: Disaster Crimes Series (Book Two)
Publisher: The Wild Rose Press
Format: Digital and Print
Page Count: 282
DIGITAL LINKS:
PRINT LINKS:
BLURB:
An Internal Affairs Investigator was murdered and his
brother, Donovan Goldwyn, was framed. Now Donovan is desperate to prove his
innocence. And the one person who can do that is the woman who saved him from a
deadly hurricane—Beth Kennedy. From the moment their fates intertwined, passion
consumed him. He wants her in his arms. More, he wants her by his side in his
darkest moments.
Beth Kennedy may not know everything about Donovan, but she
can’t deny what she feels for him. It’s her love for him that pushes her to do
whatever she has to do to help him get justice, including putting herself in a
criminal’s crosshairs.
When a tip reveals the killer's location, they travel to
California, but then an earthquake of catastrophic proportions separates them.
As aftershocks roll the land, Beth and Donovan have to endure dangerous
conditions while trying to find their way back to one another. Will they
reunite and find the killer, or will they lose everything?
HURRICANE CRIMES 99¢ SALE!
DIGITAL LINKS:
I like to write action more too. I really struggle with character development in my stories. Congrats on your book!
ReplyDeleteCharacter development takes time for sure. Thank you, Natalie!
DeleteChrys, congratulations on your book release. It sounds quite intriguing. Something about disasters draw up closer, even if for just awhile. I've been through some bad storms but thankfully no hurricanes or tornadoes.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mason! I've never been through a tornado and hope I never do. That's one disaster I won't put my characters through because I'm honestly not sure if they'd survive.
DeleteNice job! Congratulations on the release. Action can be challenging to write, but it's fun to read!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Elizabeth. I enjoy reading and writing action. :)
DeleteI never feel like there's enough emotion in what I write. I'm asking my betas about it constantly. I have a hard time with action some times, too. It usually takes me a few passes to get everything to the point where I'm happy-ish with it.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean, M.J. My beta reader really helped me. Now it's a bit easier for me to find where more emotion needs to be in my own writing.
DeleteDefinitely a scene that calls for emotion! Sometimes emotion can be tricky to sneak in to a story. My characters don't like to cooperative with me on showing emotion, either, so it can be difficult!
ReplyDeleteCharacters can be pains in that way. Sometimes we have to nudge the emotion out of them. ;)
DeleteGreat scene. Sometimes it is hard to show a character's emotions. We want the reader to "feel" what he/she feels. And also to experience the adventure with the character. You've done a nice job.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Beverly! And you're absolutely right. I'm glad you think I did a nice job with this scene. :)
DeleteCongrats, Chrys! Wishing you all the best with your books! Thank you, Diane, for hosting today. Have a great week! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Karen! Have a fabulous week! :)
DeleteCongratulations, Chrys! There's excellent emotion being shown in the scene. Pressing the phone to his forehead... I can see it so clearly.
ReplyDeleteThank you do much, Bish! I just thought of what I'd do...that helps a lot. :)
DeleteWe all have our weak points. Lack of description is mine. Thank God for critique partners!
ReplyDeleteWe do. Critique partners/beta readers are Godsends. :)
DeleteThank you so much for helping me with my blog tour, L. Diane! Being on your blog is a privilege. :)
ReplyDeleteI was pretty bad about neglecting to add enough internal thoughts so that the reader understood what was going on in my stories. Thanks to my crit partners, I'm now better at that.
ReplyDeleteA great example of a scene needing emotion. You did a beautiful job, but for sure, action is much easier to write, for me too!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, again, hope book sales are through the roof!
Where would any of us be without our Beta Readers! They deserve badges. So glad you have one to balance your action with emotional development.
ReplyDeleteWell done, Chrys.
ReplyDeleteChrys, I like action, too. That would be terrible news to receive by telephone. Good luck with your new book.
ReplyDeleteMary Montague Sikes
Notes Along the Way
The Artful Way
Thanks everyone for visiting Chrys today.
ReplyDeleteI could feel the grief bouncing off my laptop - great writing, deep emotions. Well done, Chrys :-)
ReplyDeleteHi Diane :-)
A few years ago we had a hurricane in Jamaica over the summer that left us without light for weeks. Fun times. That scene was super emotional. You're definitely doing well Chrys and thanks for bringing her as a guest Diane.
ReplyDeleteWe don't really experience any natural disasters my end of the globe...just mild earth tremors from time to time.
ReplyDeleteWe've never had a hurricane/typhoon/cyclone/whirlwind/tornado or any of those other intense disasters. Touch wood.
Great scene!
Writer In Transit
Congrats on your wonderful book Chrys and good luck with the sales.
ReplyDeleteGreat post Diane.
Yvonne.
Sometimes it's tough to remember to include enough of the character's emotions. That's how you really involve the reader. Thanks for the reminder and the example.
ReplyDeleteAww! That is definitely one emotional scene. Congrats, Chrys!
ReplyDeleteBoth books sound good. Congrats on the new book, Chris and yes, we do need to take our readers on an emotional ride with our characters.
ReplyDeleteGreat scene! Congrats, Chrys! Diane-I hope you are doing well~
ReplyDeleteThat's a nicely written, evocative scene.
ReplyDeleteI tend towards the touchy feely side, so writing action scenes is much more challenging for me.
I love books that really make you feel what the characters are going through. I think strong emotions are easy to capture in a few sentences or paragraphs. It's what you've established beforehand that sets up an emotional flood. If a character is going to lose a loved one, showing the bond beforehand is crucial.
ReplyDeleteWhoops, I meant "aren't" easy to capture. Where's my editor?
ReplyDeleteYou've got the gift, girlfriend. :-)
ReplyDeleteAnna from elements of emaginette
Gosh, I always do that. On my phone I can reply back to each comment individually, but then they show up as separate comments on my computer. Darn.
ReplyDelete@Chemist Ken, so many writers struggle with adding emotion to their own writing.
@Yolanda, thank you. I'm not sure about "through the roof" but there are some sales. haha
@C Lee, they do deserve badges someone should make some and sell them, so writers can award their beta readers with a badge after every project. :D
@Sandra, thanks!
@Mary, it certainly would be.
@Annalisa, I'm glad you could feel the grieve. I felt it while writing this scene.
@Sheena-Kay, yup. I was without power once for a about 2 weeks for one hurricane and a week for a tropical storm.
@Michelle, you're lucky!
@Yvonne, Sherry, Cherie, thanks ladies!
@J.L. and Ella, thank you so much!
@Robyn, I can understand that. I used to struggle with action but since it's pretty much all I write now it's so easy for me.
@Tamara, Ha! Well, I don't exactly get to show the bond between the brothers because Ryan is killed in Hurricane Crimes. The readers never get to meet him. I did try to share their bond while Donovan grieves though.
@Anna, thank you! :D
I finished Chrys's book today and the action and emotion were fantastic.
ReplyDeleteThat would be a very difficult scene to write. Congratulations on your book, Chrys!
ReplyDeleteCongrats, Chrys!
ReplyDeleteI am utterly horrible at writing emotion, unless it's sarcasm or stubbornness. I usually take my scenes to my critique partners and say, "Hey, do I have enough emotion? If not, what am I missing where?" Thankfully I have people who I can ask.
Emotion: Our writing wouldn't survive without it.
ReplyDeleteWow! Nailed it!
ReplyDeleteI learned the hard way too. My CP was like, um, yeah so the main character just found out that her boyfriend is a drug addict and showed zero reaction, what's up with that? ;) Lesson learned.
It's so tricky, isn't it. We need to show the emotion through actions or else thoughts about that they are reacting to. Something like "I was terrified" is far less effective that a hammering heart and imagining being torn to bits...
ReplyDelete@Medeia, thank you so much! I still cut believe you read it so fast.
ReplyDelete@Joylene, thank you!
@Loni, that's good. Critique partners are the best at pointing out areas that are lacking.
@Sandra, exactly!
@Elsie, lesson learned indeed. I had a few like that too.
@Hart, precisely. There needs to be physical reactions too.
Happy Friday, Ladies.
ReplyDeleteDiane, you are a winner!
ReplyDeleteSwing by my blog to see what book you've won!
Writer In Transit
Hey Diane and Chrys,
ReplyDeleteI totally understand that you've both been eagerly waiting for a comment from me, yes me, shy and humble Gary. Your wait is over!
Nothing like a bit of action, Chrys! Still, the emotional excerpt is a nice balance.
Love the blurb, which I only found out last year had nothing to do with the passing of wind or tummy ache.
Nice one and yes, as always, I'm taking the liberty of sharing this posting.
Gary :)
I like to do a bit of both, but I tend to under-write overall. So my CPs are forever telling me to add stuff to my stories. :-D
ReplyDeleteChrys, congratulations on your book release. It sounds quite intriguing and thrilling!
ReplyDeleteHope you're having a great evening.
ReplyDeleteBTW, nice giveaway!